Helping The Angry Man Become The Quality Man He Has Always Wanted To Be
Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame.
- Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)
Are You An Angry Man?
Angry Men Are Largely Misunderstood. The Angry Man is known for being abusive verbally, emotionally, and sometimes, physically. He hurts those closest to him; raging like a hurricane through the lives of others. This, unfortunately, is not uncommon behavior for the Angry Man. However, he is most often completely unaware, that his anger is being triggered by intense and painful, underlying feelings, including: shame, self-hatred, loneliness, and complex, emotional fear.
Honestly Consider the Following Questions:
• Has anyone ever suggested that you have an anger problem ?
• Do you often wonder why you get angry so often ?
• Do you find yourself focused on people that did you wrong ?
• Are you impatient or intolerant of yourself and others ?
• Do you find yourself arguing over being “right” a lot ?
• Do you find yourself feeling misunderstood ?
• Do you have difficulty letting others get close to you ?
If you answered yes to any two questions, then you likely have a problem with anger.
Society’s answer has been to educate the Angry Man; teaching him "anger management skills" and “quick fix strategies," all the while hoping that his anger will magically disappear. Unfortunately, education does not address the core issues, as the Angry Man's behavior is not the real problem. His angry behavior is symptomatic of intense and difficult, underlying feelings.
I help Angry Men identify the underlying causes that fuel their feelings of anger and angry behavior. Anger is initially an effect; not a cause. It is the primary response to feelings, perceptions, and assumptions that create fear and emotional pain. When I work with an intensely Angry Man, I see a man with tremendous sadness, emotional pain, and unresolved feelings.
I help Angry Men accept ownership for their actions and behaviors. He must accept the truth before he is able to change. Progress for the Angry Man is largely based on his ability to accept and 'see' difficult truths about himself.
I help the Angry Man rediscover his self-respect by helping him achieve a new understanding and perspective of himself. The Angry Man has spent much of his life reacting to the world based on shame, self-hatred, and rejection of self. He has always felt alone. He rarely feels a part of anyone or anything. Thus, the Angry Man has learned how "not to trust" people, places, or things.
I should know. I was an Angry Man.
But no more.
Today, I control my anger - it does not control me. Today I am happy. I trust. I get angry without blowing up. My life is good today. I have self-respect. People smile when they see me and actually mean it. Today, no one controls my life or my feelings but me.
"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned." -Siddhartha Gautama
"THE ANGER GUY"
EVAN L. KATZ, M.C., LPC, MAC
Anger Assessments / DUI Evaluations
Specialized Counseling for Angry Men
HELPING THE ANGRY MAN BECOME THE QUALITY
MAN HE HAS ALWAYS WANTED TO BE
678.698.0311
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